Preparing Siblings for New Baby

A new baby means change for the whole family. In addition to preparing themselves for the new arrival, parents should spend time preparing siblings for a new brother or sister. Consider the following tips to help get big brothers and sisters ready.

Set up the baby's crib early.

If there is a new bed for the older child, transition him in his new bed several months before the new baby arrives.

Rock the older child often.

Tell her how much you love her and that you will always love her. Older children will need this reassurance during a time of change.

Have a wrapped present for the older child when you come home with the new baby.

And when visitors come with gifts, allow the older child open presents for the baby.

Give older children other responsibilities for helping out around the house.

Big brother or sister will likely be proud of their new role and accomplishments with a little praise from mom or dad. Most children 15-18 months of age get a sense of control and pride by helping out with the baby as well. Being allowed to touch, hold or change the baby, or even feed the baby, can be an important part of making the older child comfortable. Do not criticize the older child's attempts to help. The baby probably does not mind his awkward attempts at care and affection.

Lower your expectations for the older child after the baby's birth and when baby arrives home.

This is a time of major transition for your older child. Younger children may not have the words to express their feeling, so anticipate that they will use actions to convey their emotions. Use a night-light in the bedroom if the child becomes frightened of the dark. A recently toilet-trained child should be given the chance of going back into diapers without teasing or punishment.

Daily routines are extremely important for children, especially those under five years of age.

Get back to the special activities or routines the older child enjoyed: story reading before bedtime, going to the grocery store, playing outside, etc. If the child has enjoyed playdates with friends or preschool, keep that schedule as intact as possible.

Try not to be overprotective…

This interferes with the older child's ability to accept the new baby.

An older child also may be less upset if the father carries the baby into the house.

After being separated, the child may want his mother, not the baby. Let the child briefly greet the baby, then try to focus your attention on the older child.

Rex Family Birth Center offers a special sibling class for children over 3 years of age to help them prepare to be a big brother or sister. For more information, call Rex HealthNet at (919) 784-4490.